Oh how far you will go...

A marathon is my limit, but what can you honestly say is yours? Running is one of those things our bodies naturally excel in. It's one of our basic reactions to fear or trouble - fight or flight. A long distance race is nothing more than a flight from the fear of failing.  It's a strange dynamic I think, but it's one that I love. This weekend I finished my fourth marathon and I have to say this was my favorite so far and was one of those runs where I finished and thought, "this is why I do this." So what did I learn this year?

Run the race in thirds: the first third with your legs, the second with your mind and the third with your heart. 

With this in mind, this is a recap my run:

The first with my legs: 0-9miles
I started the run - of course - having to go to the bathroom. My biggest fear this race was having to stop and missing minutes towards my goal. So what happens mile 4 : I can't hold it. Do I just let it go? Fall into the categories of runners who pee on themselves? No. I can't bring myself to do it -- sacrifice your body is one thing, running 22 miles in your own pee -- quite another... So I stop at a port-a-potty with a short line. A girl is waiting, I ask her how long her friend will be and she informs me that she doesn't have to go. So glancing at my watch every 2 milliseconds, I'm pacing out of anxiety and distraction to prevent from peeing - then her friend comes out and her friend goes "well I'm here now, might as well".... Fuming staring at my watch contemplating publicly relieving myself I start to panic, my pace group is out of sight, 4:40 pace group draws near. I pace even more and two and a half minutes later she finally emerges... Sweet. 2.5 minutes I have to make up. So because this is the part of the race I use my legs, I do just that - I finish my business and sprint to catch up with the 4:25 pace group -- Mile 6 I'm back in the race.

The second leg with your head: 9-18
The middle miles are always the hardest, after 13 miles no one is really cheering you on and you start to notice the nuances of the natural group that forms around you running your pace. I had the church group behind me praying the rosary for 2 miles (one involving a hill); I had the man running in a suit, I had the woman presumably coughing up a hairball. I had to play this one smart otherwise this was going to drive me crazy. So I told myself: "run for 2 minutes hard and take 2 minutes to stride." If you know me I made up a song to the beat of my pace "push, push, push for two more minutes --" counting down until I was at 15 seconds, then I counted the seconds." Very distracted and currently oblivious of my surroundings (except for the hacking because I'll be damned if I get spit on) I pressed on saw mile 18 come and go and I'm in the home stretch.

The third leg with your heart: 18-26.2
Now, you get to mile 18 and you think GREAT I have under double digits to go. And then it registers ... uh I have 8 miles to go. Mile 22 I slow for water and in an unprecedented move I bring my leg up for a high knee stretch. The sheer pain that struck my body at that moment was enough for me to cry, but I had 4 miles left and I was NOT stopping and for sure wasn't going to go down for a leg cramp! So I kept going and pulled a move only saved for this last set - I picked a guy someone I knew would give me a challenge and it was a race to the finish.
Happily hearing my name as I sprinted (yes I did!!) across the finish - my amazing boyfriend was there waiting ready to hug me in probably my most sweaty state :)

So I've divulged some secrets here that worked for me - that day I ran my personal best clocking a 4:24. A marathon is my limit, but my goals are without boundaries.
So how far will YOU go? Everyone has their limits, but this question is one of will not of ability.

Three Ways to NOT Pick Up a Girl

I went to a networking event last week and a friend of mine asks me "so what's the best way to get a girl." Now, some of you ego-crazed men are probably thinking "really, dude? Really?" Well let me tell you, the stories I've heard - y'all could use a read of this blog post :)

Now, there are a few different approaches often used by men, here's a look at a few and I've rated effectiveness, scale of 1-10: 10 being the most effective.

1. The one who plots 

Effective? 6.5
The plan: instead of approaching a girl with a line or a "hello my name is ..." this guy is bound to drop his keys or something in the girl's line of sight in hopes he can grab her attention, purposefully bumps into her, anything that offers a nice lead in without forcing himself to think too much about what to say.

Why does this work? Either we laugh at the guy and think, "wow that was really weak, points for creativity and coordination, so hey what can it hurt" (unless he bumps her down some stairs or something)

Why does this fail? It's lame... And it's lame.

2. The one who has a line for everything

Effective? 3.0
The plan: this guy will find a line for everything "hey angel, did it hurt when you fell from heaven?" "Excuse me; I think you owe me a drink.”[She says, "Why?"] “Because when I saw you from across the room I dropped mine. It was a rum and Coke, and I’m [your name].” Or how about that guy that makes a nick name for himself, "they call me go-getter, I go-get what I want, even you." Or the worst, when he tries to finish your sentence to suggest chemistry...

Why does this work? Some women believe they can really find someone who drops a line. Unlike the one who plots a guy might get a laugh - or a guffaw. Then she will probably call her friends over and ask you to repeat it ... oh wait I'm jumping ahead to the fail.

Why does it fail? This guy will become a joke, a trip down memory lane during girl talk "remember when that guy said ... "Also, no one knows someone in two seconds - even love at first sight is based on just that - sight not words, so finishing each other's sentences on day one is just annoying or a jinx. Lines generally don't work because they lack creativity and score high in search engine optimization - yes I'm saying he probably found that online.

3. Mr. Suave

Effective? 8.0
The plan: this one knows himself as the best thing she will see today, and he will tell her, "you're the best thing I've seen since I looked in the mirror." His over-arrogance, alpha-male attitude and good looks will basically make a girl think he comes with a horse and carriage.

Why does it work? All women want to be complimented and by someone who looks better than anyone their friends could pull, so if you create a technique capitalizing on such... well #FTW

Why does it fail? Sometimes these guys can go overboard and their cockiness isn't validated. If you're having a low self-conscious day stay away from this one, and yes we can sense fear.

I could go on, but I'll save you the time. Be yourself, I've heard people decide if they like someone within the first minute of meeting them - so if you lead with anything else, she won't like you.

More tips or failures to add? Write me some stories and we'll make it a series regular :)

See No Evil

So today I had an eye-opening experience...and almost burned my eye. One of my weaknesses is not being able to process or perform without caffeine, weakness/addiction, whatever. My other weakness is genetic - I have bad vision, think Coke bottle glasses, bad. These two weaknesses together.... no bueno
I have this intense eye regiment, I use a product that has a high-concentration solvent and breaks down the excess protein that my crazy eyes seem to over produce. This high-concentrated solvent has to be diluted a process that takes six hours to be effective. So you cannot put this solution right into your eye. Now, this morning I wake up and stumble to put on my contacts (my daily answer to this genetic weakness) and notice it's a little dry. So in my pre-coffee haze, I pour this high-concentrated solution onto my lens. Imagine hot sauce being poured into your eye, now multiply by 10, then add a couple minutes since contacts that are in distress stick to your eye, so my heinous situation turned into a full episode of screaming and praying that I don't go blind...at 6:30 this morning. After flushing my eye out, I reason, it's fine...wear my glasses today and I'll be fine...Until I called my eye doctor, whose receptionist tells me "OMG, you should come in like now." Of course I freak out, cry hysterically in the bathroom at work and stumble to the eye doctor.
At the end of this my eye doctor said I was fine, but I should wear my glasses for a week...Sweet. So why the dramatic post you ask? I've been on an upswing of positive energy (knock on wood) and someone recently said to me "you've been having all this good luck, just wait there's always the other shoe that's going to fall twice as hard..." After thinking, sweet Optimistic Olivia, I became really nervous and rationalized any small issue as "the other shoe." And then after this eye thing, I thought maybe almost blinding myself is the other shoe (!!!) - and then I thought "self, why is everything in life a compromise of good and evil?" It's a little disturbing that my first thought after the pain subsided was "phew, almost blindness is my ticket away from the bad shoe." So in my anxiety I spent most of this evening researching where this token phrase came from to put my mind at ease and so I thought I'd share my findings:

"A man comes in late at night to a lodging house. He sits on his bed, drags one shoe off and drops it on the floor. Guiltily remembering everyone around him trying to sleep, he takes the other one off much more carefully and quietly puts in on the floor. He then finishes undressing and gets into bed. Just as he is drifting off to sleep, a shout comes from the man in the room below: “Well, drop the other one then! I can’t sleep, waiting for you to drop the other shoe!" (World Wide Words)

So, there you go. A token phrase coined by someone probably as nervous as me, thinking, worrying and waiting for that other dang shoe.

How to Practice Safe Walking

It's a common belief that someone can be street smart, but not book smart or vice versa, but never both at the same time. I'm trying to disprove this common perception. First method is to impart my knowledge of safe walking, something I've learned. Unlike book smarts, street smarts never seem to be imparted on others, it's like a secret - something you can only learn through experience. Well I don't want you to have to learn the hard way about street smarts in the city, so here is my wisdom.
You have to remember I grew up in Ohio- Shaker, Ohio for that matter. Next to nothing happened without you bringing it on yourself; it's one of those towns that has rare sensational news (excluding the weather). So, growing up in Ohio the idea of "know your surroundings" could mean - be aware of deer crossing (if you see one, there are more, deer travel in packs). Or if you are taking the trash out late at night there could be skunks, coyotes, foxes?! In New York, being aware of your surroundings means something totally different: know which car the sketched out crack head is entering to avoid inevitable harassment on your commute, avoid the crack head lingering on the corner begging for change he might bump you and either transfer bed bugs or pick-pocket you, avoid the half way house because if that's not self explanatory there are probably crack heads there. Maybe the biggest challenge of being aware is knowing where the crack heads live and then out smarting them with avoidance or my new technique....

WAIT FOR IT

If you are walking alone and feeling a little unnerved begin talking to yourself that will send a message of "this one is crazy." This employs the strategy, if you can't beat 'em join 'em. The other day I began erratically talking to myself about a made-up friend Samson and laughing hysterically at my own jokes. Now, the crazy vibe you have to send has to be enough to permeate someone who's high, but not enough to look fake or vulnerable. You don't want "oh that one is special this will be easy" you want "holy smokes, I don't want to even know..." This will not work if you have head phones in, your conversation cannot sound systematic, it has to sound completely irrational, yet plausible. Make sense?
Wish I could patent* this technique, but instead I'll pass along as one of my helpful tips to surviving the city. I think this can work for anyone implemented correctly, coupled with these simple street smarts:

1. Don't walk down dark alleys
2. Carry mace
3. Don't look drunk if you are in fact walking home intoxicated (aka walk straight)
4. Run towards the police station - in NYC there's likely one within running distance
5. Most crack heads are off balance, last case scenario go for the shins
6. Don't forget your life is more important than valuables
7. Cross the street if you feel like you should - go with your gut
8. Don't walk in your house or apt if you think someone is following you
9. Make good choices

*Also cannot patent, because it was a helpful tip as down.