I've found myself obsessively thinking about how to go forward with my hair because if you don't know: maintain black hair is a long and arduous process. Why? I don't know, but let me demystify a few common misconceptions or things you just don't know when it comes to black hair. My hair wet doesn't look the same once it's dried (unless you want to wait 2.5 hours). Washing my hair is an ordeal, it takes time - wash, deep condition, blow dry and flat iron. I'm tending to my hair so much on Sundays, I feel like I have to break have dinner for energy and go back to taming. My hair is thick - it's healthy for the most part (knock on wood), but it's thick. It's hard to maintain with my workout plan - ever notice in the gym, women either have "gone natural" (afros, twists, dreds) some other form of natural styling, but very few are relaxed and breaking a sweat. It's pretty much impossible and becomes an ultimatum it's either nice hair or a fit bod.
To me it's six in one hand half a dozen in another - relaxing your hair, hoping for little to no breakage OR going natural? I'm sorry, but I don't think I can deal with the TWA (Teeny Weeny Afro). Definition: TWA is the beginning of the natural process, when the person going natural makes the big chop, cuts all her hair down to get rid of the relaxed hair, what's left is a teeny weeny afro.
On the other hand I've seen evidence of perpetually relaxing and hair loss that can come of that. Plenty have seen the movie "Good Hair", but you probably only know a small dose of the reality that the documentary reveals. While Chris Rock so eloquently tried to explained to the nation the history and conundrum of black hair, it's not as easy as you think to go through and get rid of your process treatment. When you think about the time invested over years and years to see it do nothing, but make things worse? Makes you wish there was a warning label with the long term effects. Then again, it probably wasn't your decision - I can just see my Dad now, struggling with this massive ball of hair wondering "what can I do to my baby's hair?" and a Just For Me commercial comes on like an answer to his prayers.
Going natural won't save me any time - in fact I'll probably go back to where this journey all started and wonder - what am I going to do with this hair.
So now that I've talked myself in circles, getting no closer to a decision, and making a confusing situation even nappier, here's my true question what is really going to work? Or maybe another peel off the old onion of life, is letting me know I'm going to need to accept what I have and make it work?
Either way, it's Sunday - so I have some hair maintenance to attend to. Until next time my dear readers!
Being natural is totally more work, but it's really cool to become acquainted with your childhood hair! It's like a long lost friend. There are protective styles you can were while working out that you can morph into another fabulous style, or, just go with wash and go styles (which take no time at all!). As for the TWA, I opted out of that, and went for the long transition. I grew it out and continued to just press my hair, or wear it in roller sets for about 6 months. During that time, I would just gradually trim off the relaxed ends. It was far less traumatic, but QUITE a burden dealing with 2 textures of hair. If I could re-do I would probably want to just chop it all off, but that is very very scary, and doesn't give you time to figure out what your hair likes!
ReplyDeleteI started growing my hair out for the first time when I was 20, but didn't make the commitment to actually "go natural" until I was 23. So take your time, and when you're ready it will be beautiful!
Good luck!! Know that you have tons of support in the natural world. :)
Miss Denise, that was soooo helpful. It's a process in itself making that commitment, thanks for the note :) Your hair looks beautiful!
ReplyDeleteGirl I ask my self the same questions there are alternatives besides the twa lets talk!
ReplyDeleteGreat post Danielle, I have other friends considering the pros and cons of going natural. As the girls above mentioned, there are certainly other options besides doing the BC (Big Chop). We talked a little bit about hair in the past but another suggestion I have for you is just not relaxing your hair AS OFTEN and using more natural styles with your relaxed hair so that you can slowly ween yourself off of the relaxer.
ReplyDeleteAnother thing you can do, is stop relaxing and begin texturizing it. It's still chemical but not as harsh as a relaxer.
And contrary to popular belief, I don't think natural hair is super hard to maintain. The most difficult thing for me to do is the whole wash/deep condition process, but that's difficult whether your hair is natural or relaxed. Everyday styles for me are twist/braid the night before, shake it out and/or pin it up and/or pull it back, and go! Takes me 5-10 mins to do my hair everyday and takes 20 minutes if I decide to do a twist-out the night before.
Good luck girl,
Jen